A New Semester... Again

Today is the start of a new semester... and here we go again. I'm so ready for it to begin though because if all goes well, I only have one more year of classes to go!!! The countdown begins. This semester, I'm taking:

1) History of Black Women in America - not really related to my research, but it was one of the courses offered from the U.S. Historians this semester, and I figured it goes well with my Modern U.S. and Women & Gender fields.

2) Center for Historical Research year-long fortnightly seminar: State, Power and Culture - once again not really connected to my work, but I think it can be useful since I study the interaction of state and non-state actors, and culture.

3) Independent Study course - I'll do readings about women and transnational history. Really excited about this, although I foresee a lot of intense reading. When it's just you having one-on-one sessions with the professor, you better know your stuff!

Other than those 3 classes, I'm grading for a History of Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) History in America, 1940-2003. Yeah...*sigh* I know a lot of other graduate students would love to be in my place, given the current political situation in America and since LGBT history is an up-and-coming field. I'm excited to work with the professor who is teaching this class because he's very friendly, and his work utilizes oral history interviews (which I do too). We have talked about the methodology of oral history interviews, and he has some very useful suggestions and advice.

It's just that I'm not completely comfortable with this subject of queerness, given the current political climate and my personal views and values. I believe that everyone deserves to be treated with kindness and love, and I have a very strict "no-bullying" stance. However, I draw the line at homosexual sexual relations and gay marriage. It is already difficult to discuss (and defend) my feelings with others without them going, "Oh it's just your stupid, oppressive religion that's making you discriminate against others." How am I going to survive being immersed this semester in a course that is most likely going to outright defend and advocate a position that I disagree with?

Of course, as a grader, it isn't my place to go against the professor. It is his course, and he has every right and freedom to design the course however he wants to. I also sincerely feel that we can benefit from greater knowledge about subjects that are not as well-studied, such as LGBT history. Most knowledge helps humanize others and makes us more understanding, hence my "no-bullying" stance.

I just don't know how I'm going to balance between being fair while making sure that I don't cross the line. Will I emerge unscathed at the end of the semester? Probably not.

It's going to be quite a semester.