Top 10 Memories for 2014

Once again, it's time for my annual Top 10 Memories of the Year (you can scroll through the archives for 2012 and '13). Feel free to skip this post completely, since I'm recapping things that I've probably blogged about in the past, but it's always nice for me to look back and see what I've done (or not), just in time to welcome in the new year. Btw, HAPPY NEW YEAR! So without further ado, my Top 10 Memories for 2014, once again in no particular order:

1) Summer 2014-- and what a summer it was! I was able to go home after being away for 2 years, and spent about 2.5 months there. It was AWESOME (cue music "Everything is awesome! Everything is cool when you're part of the team..." Incidentally I watched the Lego Movie on the plane ride home). Aside from spending time with my family, I was also spoiled by my mom who took me shopping, eating and traveling (in return I cleaned our home... so guess I wasn't too spoiled?). 

2) Siem Reap, Cambodia. 

This is still one of my all time favorite holidays I've ever been to. I blogged about my trip HERE, HERE, HERE, and (guess where) HERE. You can tell how much I cherished my time there from the number of posts I've written about it! 

3) I can officially add the alphabets "M" and "A" to the back of my name, bwa ha ha ha! There was so much drama in the process of obtaining that darn piece of paper, but everything worked out and I officially received my Masters in August. Now, only 4 more years to go... 

4) I'm building up my career... slowly: My article in Women of Faith in the Latter Days, Vol. 3 was published (more about it here); I contributed to a podcast about Singapore in World War One (listen to it here); one of my profs wrote very nice feedback to a final paper I submitted; I gave a presentation to a group of middle-schoolers about the Civil Rights Movement; I'm serving on several committees in school... It's been a hard year but I'm adjusting to this tough life little by little, and am grateful for these opportunities. Thank goodness grad school gets better, a semester and a year at a time!

5) Christmas in Pittsburgh with the Lius! Pittsburgh was really fun, plus I participated in an act of meaningful service. And even though it's been a few days since I've been back in Columbus, I'm still thinking of my friends' terrific cooking.

6) I began another blog, My Kind of Feminism (URL link: http://anotherkindoffeminism.blogspot.com/). I'm tired of people looking at me like I'm crazy when I identify as a feminist, especially since I'm a practicing Mormon, and it doesn't help that conversations about Mormon feminism is DOMINATED by a very Eurocentric agenda. So I'm fighting against it, and showing how my religion and feminism work together in my own way. I don't post as often there but feel free to read and comment on it; I only ask that you remain polite in your feedback.

7) Relief Society President no more! It has been 1.5 years since I was called to lead the women's organization in my congregation, and I was finally "released" before the Christmas break began. It was bittersweet, but I know it was the right decision, especially since I need time to prepare for a huge exam in April. The new president is also wonderful and can minister to the women in ways that I can't.

8)Two profoundly significant spiritual experiences (I guess I'm cheating with my "10" limit by dividing them into a & b):
a) I came across this speech, "Sweet Above All that is Sweet," given by Sheri Dew at the BYU Women's Conference in May 2014 (video and transcript), and it is MAGNIFICENT. I can't tell you how many times I've read and re-read this talk.
b) The past few years haven't been kind to my spiritual growth, especially being a historian who has been exposed to some terrible aspects of Mormon history. But this year, I was able to find peace and reconcile myself to an issue that I've been struggling with. That feeling of relief is sweet and beautiful.

9) I experienced online bullying for the first time. Not only was I shocked and upset by the experience for a period of time, I couldn't believe that it was sparked by ONE LINE I wrote on my Facebook wall about the Michael Brown shooting. It's one thing to disagree and voice your opinions in a calm, rational manner; it's another thing to attack me personally, especially when you noticed that I wouldn't respond to you. And this from a friend whom I barely knew from my mission and haven't seen in a few years. However, this incident has made me realize just how real and damaging internet bullying is (so STOP IT), and how we have become a society that is so easily provoked to disagreement.

10) Don't take this the wrong way, but I've come to terms with being single and am very at peace with my current (non)marital status. Sure, it would be nice to have a companion--it's a natural human instinct and need. Yet, I genuinely enjoy being single, and don't yearn to be married. I'm no longer bitter about not being asked out; I'm very self aware of why men don't find me attractive or worthy date-material (no, really, I'm fine. Don't need to protest. Just being realistic); I'm happy for my friends who are married and have children; I admire those who push through difficult marital and parenting problems, and is probably why some of my blog posts are related to motherhood (examples HERE and HERE).
I just don't care to make the same commitments. Perhaps I'm caught in the "Peter Pan" complex, although in my defense it's not that I shun these commitments. Rather I've realized that God hasn't required them from me as yet, so darn right I'll enjoy my "freedom" while I can! This isn't a feeling that I consciously "chose" to have. I didn't get up one morning and say, "Hey, I'm choosing to sincerely feel like it's awesome to be single!" Instead, it was a process that took a couple of years, lots of introspective self-reflection, and it doesn't hurt that friends sometimes post things on social media about the more "sucky" aspects of companionate and family life. I finally reached an equilibrium this year, and felt a peace wash over me. Weird but comforting. Que sera sera.

And perhaps these are fitting words to welcome in the new year-- "Que sera sera." Too many tragedies occurred in 2014, such as the 3 Malaysian airline disasters (they still haven't found MH370), racial conflict, kidnappings, shootings... No doubt 2015 is bound to have its fair share as well. So, HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE, AND QUE SERA SERA!!!

P.S. 2014 Honorable Mention: Moved to a town home! Much thanks to my roommate and the person who took over my lease (they did the heavy lifting, moving while I was in Singapore), I began the new school year in a new place with a bigger bedroom, cheaper rent, and a home with a basement and stairs!!! It's awesome, although further from the bus stop than my previous apartment. 

Last Trip of the Year- Hello Pittsburgh

I don't really know how to describe Pittsburgh except that it's a mish-mash of sorts. My friends were telling me that you can drive from one end to the other end of the city, and pass through alternating wealthier and ghetto neighborhoods. Unlike Columbus where one section of the city is a definite "do not go there," Pittsburgh weaves the good and bad together. But I guess that's what makes this city so unique. I visited the city over Christmas break to visit my best friend and her husband, and it was a really fun trip. Here are a few of the highlights:

The Cathedral of Learning at the University of Pittsburgh- not only is it GORGEOUS, it literally is a cathedral that has rooms and auditoriums for classes. Anyone who goes to Pittsburgh should definitely check this place out.

L-R: The Cathedral, inside view from the 2nd/3rd floor, view from 36th floor

This gothic-style building was built in the 1920s and is the second tallest university building in the world (42 stories).What is even more unique is that the 1st and 3rd floors have classrooms decorated according to various themes, e.g. Hungarian room, African heritage room, Armenian room, etc. You can purchase tickets to take a tour, but be warned that tickets sell out fast (I arrived for the 1:30pm tour, only to find out that tickets for the rest of the day were already sold out. Maybe it's the holidays?). No worries if you don't make it on the tour though- you can still visit the main hall and classrooms on the 3rd floor, and take the elevators to the top of the building for a breathtaking view of the city. 

*I think the tour takes you into the classrooms on the 1st floor, and gives better explanations for the decorative motifs in the rooms.

Heinz Memorial Chapel - right next to the Cathedral of Learning. Why does OSU not have similar gorgeous buildings on campus :(

I so wanted to go inside, but sadly it was closed for the holidays. Super bummed, because if the exterior is anything to go by, the interior would have been magnificent! 

Primanti Bros.: When in Rome, eat like the Romans do-- and Primanti Bros. is one such establishment in Pittsburgh.The eatery is famous for its sandwiches that come with meat, cheese, fries and coleslaw squeezed between sliced soft bread. I tried the pastrami "burger" with provolone cheese and all offered toppings, and it was an experience. Doesn't look like much but it was one gigantic monster that I stuffed into my mouth (as seen from the picture). The sandwich was delicious, but I still prefer my fries on the side, and I haven't made up my mind if I like coleslaw in my sandwich or not.

Mt. Washington: What a treat! Mt. Washington is actually a neighborhood on a hill across a river, but there is a lookout that provides a gorgeous view over the rest of the city. We were fortunate to witness the sunset, and I wish my phone was better able to capture its beauty.

Snapshots of the Mt. Washington neighborhood

Carnegie Mellon University

My best friend's husband is attending Carnegie Mellon, and I was thus fortunate to be taken on a tour of the campus and visit his office. The campus was smaller than I expected, but beautiful. Plus, it's Carnegie Mellon so expect some really cool engineering things, such as the tiny 3D printer constructed by a graduate student. Moreover, the recycle bins around campus are solar powered. That's right, solar powered, to press the recycling waste down. Kinda cool.

Others sights around the campus included the "Walking to the Sky" sculpture, the gorgeous architecture building (both on left), and the napping machine created by an alumni. We also visited the rare manuscript collection in the library where we got to see an exhibition of the many editions of "Twas' the Night Before Christmas" (including an edition printed on linen!), and a page of the Gutenberg Bible.

THE FOOD: Oh my word, the food in Pittsburgh was awesome, mostly because my friends can cook. Seriously. They made Hainanese Chicken Rice from scratch!!! Ah ah ah ah ah! I think that's what I miss most about Pittsburgh (other than my friends, of course...).
We also ate delicious food whenever we went out to each, such as at Primanti Bros., a Chinese restaurant Everyday Noodles, and a makeshift Mexican food stall, Las Palmas. We had pork belly buns, hand-made broad noodles and meaty wantons from Everyday Noodles that tasted authentic and brought me back to my mission in Taiwan *tear falling on cheek.* Las Palmas... oh my word, so cheap and SO GOOD, if you don't mind eating in your car since the tacos are sold in front of a Mexican grocery store with no sitting area.

If there's one thing I don't miss, it's the awful parking situation. You either have to pay for it, or there's just nowhere to park. My friends' apartment complex refused to provide visitor parking, so I had to park a street over in a non-permit road in front of some homes. Even then, one home-owner came out a few days later and told me to move my car, even when I told him I was leaving in 2 days. "You've parked there for what, a week? [Uh, no, only 4 days so far] Go bother someone else. Give us a break. " *Grrr* Glad he's not my neighbor. One thing to be grateful for in Columbus- parking isn't too bad, and cheaper meter parking too.

Still, despite the terrible parking situation, Pittsburgh is awesome. Wouldn't mind going back again, especially for the food! Thanks to my bestie and her husband for letting me crush their Christmas celebration :) 

True Spirit of Christmas

Guess where I'm typing this from?
Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania!!!

My best friend and her husband are here for a year for him to complete a Masters at Carnegie Mellon (yup, that smartie), and since it's only a 3 hour drive from Columbus, I decided to brave the weather and drive here. We made this arrangement a few months back, but I kinda invited myself to Christmas... but I really didn't want to spend Christmas in Columbus again (I did that for the past 2 years... enough!), and they were so gracious to agree to my plans. Bwa ha ha ha ha! I've been here 2 days already and it's been nothing but relaxing, fun and GOOD food. I'm telling you, it's awesome to have friends that cook well.

Anyway, while I was here, I ended up going to the hospital on Christmas Day.

Wait, don't freak out. Let me explain. About a week ago, a 10-year-old child from West Virginia developed an ailment in her brain. She was air-flown into Pittsburgh, and remained in the pediatric ICU of the hospital this entire week, while her frantic and very patient parents stayed by her bedside in the hospital.

We found out about them because her parents go to a congregation of my church in West Virginia. Their church leader contacted the church leaders here in Pittsburgh, and coordinated with them to drop off meals for this couple in the hospital (the power of the Relief Society- seriously). My best friend signed up to deliver food to them on Christmas Day, and that's how I ended up in the hospital yesterday.

The visit was like a lightning jolt to me. Not only was I able to witness the Christmas Spirit in action, it was humbling to be reminded of what I have. True, I'm far from home, the weather is super gloomy, school is tough, and life is just... hard. But my parents don't have to be at a hospital bedside on Christmas Day, praying that I'll wake up from a coma.

Truly I have been so blessed.

Everyone's Lives Matter

Slightly over a week ago, when the the Ferguson grand jury decision came down on Monday night, I wrote a blog post expressing my dissent with the decision, and a one-liner on Facebook --"No justice, no peace. RIP Michael Brown." That one line ended up offending a friend so much, he wrote some awful comments on my Facebook wall. Not wanting to get into a pointless Facebook debate (as usually all Facebook debates end up being), I refused to comment back, although another friend came to my rescue... twice (thanks Erin!).

Well, I was ready to put these unpleasant incidents (the indictment decision and the Facebook bullying) behind me and move on, when the grand decision over Eric Garner's death came down yesterday, and split my heart open again.

You can read multiple articles about the case so I will only summarize that on July 17, 2014, a group of police officers surrounded Eric Garner, a black man suspected of selling untaxed loose cigarettes (none were found on him there and then btw). Although Garner was confrontational, he was unarmed and did not assault any cops. When Garner shouted at them to stop harassing him, then swatted their hands away as they tried to take him in, Officer Daniel Pantaleo put Garner in a chokehold position, a moved banned by the NY Police Department. The officers then forced Garner to the ground (still in the chokehold), and ignored cries that he couldn't breath, and Pantaleo even held Garner's head to the sidewalk while the latter was handcuffed.

The autopsy report revealed that Garner died a few minutes later from the chokehold that was compounded by his obesity and asthma, and the New York medical examiner ruled it a homicide. Parts of the video filmed by a passerby who recorded the incident can be found on Huffington Post here and CNN here[probably want to watch it asap before it is taken down].

Yesterday, the Stanton Island grand jury decided that no crime had been committed, and that they would not indict Pantaleo.

At first I had written a whole post venting my outrage over the situation, but now, my rage has simply turned into disgust and despair, and even now I'm still struggling to reconcile my emotions with words on this blog. No words can express my disappointment and sorrow for how everything went down. Perhaps if the nation had had time to heal from Ferguson, it wouldn't have been so bad, but coming right at its heels...

In a very sick and twisted way, I can see the "reasons" (read:excuses) why the grand jury did not indict Daniel Pantaleo. The chokehold position that Pantaleo performed on Garner is legal; it's just banned by the NY Police Department. Thus, Pantaleo technically did not break the law. If we want to talk details, technically Garner's swatting of the cops' hands can be counted as resisting arrest, and thus sort-of justify why Pantaleo needed to use a more forceful method (but of all methods, he chose the chokehold- really?!). Finally, Pantaleo didn't maliciously intend to kill Garner -- adrenaline can be a very powerful thing, so once again, technically Garner's death was an accident, and thus technically not a crime. [Please note that Pantaleo apparently has a history of racially-motivated misconduct while on the job.]

But just because something is legal doesn't make it right. I'm still reeling from how Garner's death can be ruled a homicide, and still the grand jury decided there wasn't even probably cause for a crime. A man caused another man to die unnecessarily, and he walked free.

It just makes me sad.

I'm Thankful for Restaurants Open on Thanksgiving

This year's Thanksgiving was certainly memorable, all thanks to...


Remember THIS POST when I talked about a mid-semester slump? Sadly, it didn't get better. A few weeks ago, my roommate asked what we wanted to do this year for Thanksgiving, and I just groaned in reply. For the past two years, we had hosted Thanksgiving for a couple of friends here in Columbus who were in a similar situation to us ("stranded" with no family to celebrate with). This year, however, we were both so mentally exhausted, we didn't even want to make plans for Thanksgiving. The thought of cooking/ baking just didn't seem appealing.

And this is major because Thanksgiving dinner is my FAVORITE FESTIVE DINNER of the entire year. To me, Thanksgiving dinner beats Christmas dinner hands down, and *gasp* even Chinese New Year dinner. I always make something for Thanksgiving without fail (two years ago I made green bean casserole 3Xs!!!).

This year though... GAAAAAH! So my roommate and I, along with two other friends from our congregation, decided that we were going out to eat dinner. And boy, am I glad, and SO VERY THANKFUL THAT PEOPLE ARE WILLING TO WORK ON THANKSGIVING. I know, I know, in an ideal world, everyone would be given the day off.

And in an ideal world, I wouldn't be so exhausted that the thought of even buying a turkey wouldn't send shudders down my back.

But back to reality: We had to hunt around a bit since most places were understandably close, and finally found Texas de Brazil. Similar to Tucanos and Rodizio Grill, Texas de Brazil serves Brazilian-style food, with the sliced meat served to you, and an unlimited soup, salad and sides bar. For Thanksgiving, they added a few more traditional side dishes to the menu, and the cost of the meal included a free soda and a dessert.

Oh
my
word,
the food was soooooo good!

4 Happy Customers

Yes, I sacrificed some of my favorite traditional foods, like stuffing and green bean casserole and endless dessert... plus, it cost A LOT of money ($45+ tax + tip!!! I've never spent so much on myself for a meal in my life!). But oh man, the payoff was so worth it. The food was excellent, the service was wonderful, and they even allowed us to pack dessert home since we were stuffed to the max by the end of dinner. Best of all, no cleaning! Bwa ha ha ha ha ha ha! I woke up today wanting to go back and eat the meat again.

Once again, I truly appreciate those who sacrifice their time with family and friends to work so that other people can have Thanksgiving Dinner. You guys have no idea how relieved I was to have found this place, and then be treated so well there! Thank you.

Happy Holidays everyone! Hope you guys had a fun and excellent Thanksgiving like I did, especially during this cold November.

No Justice, No Peace

Last night, Darren Wilson was not indicted for putting 6 bullets into Michael Brown's body. And Ferguson bled.

Yes, I am aware that Brown was not entirely innocent -- there was drugs in his system, he had robbed a store, he resisted arrest and got into a scuffle with Wilson, etc. When the news first broke months ago, I myself thought, "Michael Brown is not really the best example we want to use to talk about injustice, even if he was a young man..."

Then I read about the 6 bullets.

6 bullets. How many times do you need to shoot to injure the suspect enough to apprehend him/her?  I don't know what the magic number is, but 6??? Furthermore, Brown was unarmed. It wouldn't have been so clear a case if Brown had a weapon and injured Wilson. However, Brown did not have a weapon, and when you shoot 6 bullets into an unarmed person, it's a no brainer-- guess who's going to die.

What really galls me is the fact that Wilson was not even indicted to go to trial, which means he will not have to account for every bullet that he put into Brown's body. You want to talk about defending Wilson, what about letting him explain every single decision behind every single bullet. Perhaps there was a justification for 6 bullets, but guess what, we'll never know now.

Aside from the clear injustice of the decision, my Facebook has been inundated with posts either protesting the decision, or saying something along the lines of, "Why are people looting and protesting and using violence to voice their disagreement with the decision, or vent their anger against the system? It doesn't solve anything"

Well, my friends, because this is not a one-time thing that black people happen to vent their anger out on. The truth is, Darren Wilson is not the 1st or 2nd or 3rd or 4th or 5th or 6th or 10th or even the 100th police officer to commit such a gross crime, especially against black people or people of racial minority. This is probably the X000th time this has happened. For example, see THIS ARTICLE detailing another recent incident, the Trayvon Martin shooting. The article also throws into relief some needed historical perspective that shows how black people have been repeatedly screwed over thrown under the bus by the system throughout the decades.

Pray, tell me, how many times should one group of people suffer from injustice again and again and again and again and again and again and again before they have had enough and decide to fight back? True, violence and looting are probably not the best solutions to venting anger and frustration, but I can understand the fury behind their actions.

I wrote on my Facebook status "No justice, no peace. RIP Michael Brown," and a friend commented, "Seriously?" I'm not sure what he meant by that, except to infer that he disagreed with my status, and that's fine. However, I would like to respond here:
Yes, I'm serious. There was no justice to this decision. How do you expect me, a woman of racial minority, to have peace of mind, knowing that a cop can shoot me (or my future children) 6 times, and walk free, without even having to go to trial? Sure, Michael Brown wasn't your star poster child, but neither did he deserve to have 6 bullets put into his body. And yes, I'm serious when I say that I hope Michael Brown rests in peace. 

Mid-Semester Slump- It's Real!

It's that time of the year again for those in school: the mid-semester slump.
URGH!
It has really hit me hard this year. Case in point:

Yesterday morning, as I walked into my office, a fellow grad student who serves with me on the Graduate Student Advisory Committee* asked me if we had a committee meeting the next morning. I had completely forgotten about the meeting, and was glad he reminded me.

The next morning, as I waited at the bus stop to go to school, I took out my phone to, well, that's what everyone does now for various reasons, right? Anyway, I took out my phone and saw that I had a slew of new text messages from other GSAC committee members. Three of them wrote that they were going to be very late for the meeting, and another apologized that he/she would not be able to attend.

And that was when I realized that I had forgotten about the meeting... AGAIN. *Facepalm* The meeting was scheduled to start at 10am, and there I was, waiting at the bus stop at 9:57am, oblivious to the mini-storm of anxious text messages until I checked my phone. Thank goodness most of us were late, and decided to reschedule the meeting till next week.

Thanksgiving and Christmas break can't come fast enough.

*The Graduate Student Advisory Committee (GSAC) consists of six graduate students in the history department at OSU, and they represent the graduate student body to the various faculty committees in the history department, and also organize forums/ events for graduate students.